Jamie - - A staple in a group of papers

Jamie

Jamie's Relationship Factor
4th place

Let me state that this page is completely my opinion. You can reserve the right to judge Jamie however you would like to. I am using this page just to inform you of what I have learned over the 4 or so months I have known her.

I have no intention to accurately report Jamie's personality, it's only what I have figured out on my own. Many of these things might not be entirely true to what Jamie's actual personality is like, it's only what she has let me find out, or more importantly, what she wants me to think about herself.

If you would like to update my information database;
anything you think you know that I don't, you may do so here.
doug@dougmalcore.com

A brief history

I walked into an interview at Choice One, many moons ago...
I was late, of course, I met my future boss, and a few other ladies,

them being Jamie, and her sister Stacie - the GM of Choice One Milwaukee.

after the interview, i sat around for a bit, doing god knows what,
and decided to work some charm and magic with the hot 'secretary' working.
After thinking up a good line for about 5 minutes... "so, do you like doing secretary work?"

yeah, that was the best I could come up with...

"I'm not a secretary, I'm an ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT" came the reply.

Ouch is right!

So after chatting with her a big after the terrible opening...

She started opening up a little bit. We talked about 'bars' and other useless stuff like that. More importantly, she started hitting on me BIG TIME. (which I've gotten quite used to by this point of my life)

So, I've started working at Choice One, and Jamie and myself really only exchanged pleasentries.

"Good Morning Jamie, How does the day find you." and so on and so forth.
And things continued on this way for many months.

Finally, an oppurtunity presents itself.

Ok, so night #1 wasn't good for me, but obviously, better nights ensue.

The Plot Thickens Jamie started to ask me to do stuff occaisionally. Now, before I get into any of this, let me explain a few things.

relationship page.

So we go out, and talk about our Christmas plans a bit.
I had no urge whatsoever of driving to Luxemburg to hang out with my family.
My brothers moved in with my Grandma due to issues with my father, and everyone is taking sides.
I just didn't want to be involved in that.

Jamie suggests that we hang out. Cool with me, I don't have to be a looser by myself,
and I can show off some of the cooking talents.

I made a long drive to a great meat place to get this.

Quickly became a Jamie Schlegelmilch Favorite

with the dressing 'shaken' on. The only way to eat a salad.

Very good, suggested by Jamie

Jamie got this stuff from Indiana. Quickly became a Doug Malcore Favorite

Didn't really eat these, but a meal like this you have to have a dessert.

What an incredibly good meal that was. Most of the wine we drank Christmas Eve.
Christmas eve was probably one of the coolest nights of my short life.
We ate spegetti, and drank loads of wine, listened to some good songs. It was a fun time.

By the end of the holiday season, Jamie and I came out knowing a bit more about each other.
Which leads us pretty much to where everything stands today.

Life as we know it, how things go...

As you might imagine, Jamie and I have our share of ups and downs

This is mostly due to some issues that I am having with myself.

As I get older, it's harder to adapt to certian situations

You get involved in so many relationships, and some of those are for a long time,

It's sometimes hard to start over

Well, I've pretty much worked these things out,

And of course, whenever I communicate, things get better

So I'm looking forward to some good times with Jamie, as they always are.

Jamie's Assets to Doug

I couldn't have more fun with a girl
Jamie is one of the most witty people I've ever met Let me tell you, when a chick is witty, it's pretty goddamn cool
Jamie and I share a number of interests
I would have liked to say we had similar tastes in music, but as i got to know her better, I've realized that's not true, sure, we like the same bands, and some of the same music. She's opened me up to a number of artists I would not have considered, but can you honestly expect me to respect someone's musical tastes...when they like the Bananarama song "Cruel Summer". I remember riding with my mother in grade school hearing that song in the car. I have never hated a song so bad. And SHE LOVES IT! That's cool though, because she makes up for it.
Jamie is not a 'clingy' girl at all. She pretty much let's me do my own thing, without always 'mothering' me
Although, she will not hesitate to kick me in the ass, or bite my fingers too hard, or hit me with a bunch of cheap shots
Jamie might be one of the most gorgeous girls I've ever met
Jamie likes Kitties, although she doesn't like how I take care of mine
Jamie confides in me for the most part
I think she kinda trusts me, which is cool
Jamie demands respect, and I respect her more than everyone else i know
Everyone likes Jamie. If someone doesnt like Jamie, it's because they have some emotional problem
Everyone wants to be Jamie's friend
Everyone is jealous of me because I got to talk to her all the time
Jamie has good morals, and I could easily trust Jamie
The best thing about typing Jamie instead of her name is that I don't have to worry about spelling it wrong.

The Latest, and why things go as they do.

Obviously, things don't go well when you move out of town. And things weren't going well with Jamie and myself when I was still in Milwaukee. That's a whole other story that I could never put into words, mostly because I don't understand it myself. I guess that's a perfect description of my entire dealings with Jamie. I just never understood anything.

So we weren't talking a whole bunch. Her birthday came, and I made her a little card, one like you'd get from blue mountian, all animated and stuff, but I just made it all myself. A hell of a lot of work, mind you, esp. for someone you rarely speak to. Anyway, I decide to move back home, to help my dad, when all of sudden she emails me. We chat a bit, I tell her I'm leaving, and all of sudden we get really close again. But I still left.

So I'm in Casco, she's in Milwaukee, and times are probably as good as they've ever been, for a while that is. Slowly, the distance, or whatever you can blame things on, just became to much. I started not being as cool as I should have, I started to get sick of writing long emails with no response, basically just talking to myself. So I just tried to shut it off. And she was so on and off about everything. One week, she'd be calling me all the time, while I'm working, emailing me like crazy, and then the next week, I wouldn't hear anything at all for her. But we'd get together about once a month, her driving here that is. And everything was always great times, for me at least. Then, our "meetings" started becoming the same thing. All on and off good times. And when things don't go as I expect them to, I just get damned frustrated, trying to figure things out. Well, we had one of those bad weekends, and the following one she set up this whole thing for me to go to Milwaukee on my birthday, which I did.

Probably not a good idea. I could kinda tell she was pretty sick of me. I mean, she was all standofish the weekend before, and by the time I met her in Milwaukee, I knew that I shouldn't have came. It was pretty obvious she didn't want me there. So the whole weekend I'm thinking she only had me there because it was my birthday, and she didn't want to be mean. I could be wrong about that, and I probably should have said something, but it never seems I get an honest answer to questions like that. So I let it ride, and probably made things even worse. I just bolted out of the car when she dropped me off to leave too. At that point, I didn't want this whole discussion about how we shouldn't do "this thing" anymore. I figured it would be best for her to do what she felt she had to do over a email. Less painful for me.

So I sent her a 'thanks' email when I got home, and she sent some complete bullshit email back. "i want to thank you for this weekend as well, it was very nice". Yeah, picture someone saying that. So I made a good attempt at being cool, pretending like nothing was wrong, but there was no response for a month. So I sent an email a month later, and she told me that she just needed a break from me. Fuck you know. I was/am just confused about that whole thing, and sometimes I think that is the only reason I maintain interest in someone who treats me like shit most of the time. Granted, sometimes are really cool, but I feel like shit most of the time. Anyway, I maintain interest probably just because I'm so confused, and I just have some fucked up need to figure it out.

I'm moving to Arizona now, and obviously, it's all over then. I don't really plan on having any friends from Wisconsin to keep a legitimate friendship with. If things went how I wanted to, if I would have left Milwaukee, and left my feelings for Jamie there, I would have been fine. I know I would have. But with Jamie, nothing ever worked out how I wanted it to. I stuck with her, trying to convince myself that she actually cared about me, and now I can't get over it.

I'm never like that either. I plan things out well in my head, to a point where it really can't go wrong, but she has some sort of power that I can't be strong willed with her.

I'll be honest. I'm not being completely straight in this description. I'm actually afraid of Jamie sometimes, so I'm trying to be tame, and sacrificing pride for the fact that I really don't want to hear any responses to this. I've said too much already, but I have my obligations to this site. When things get rolling for me out of state, and I get away from it all for a while. You'll definitely hear more.

To be completely honest with you, I'm just flat out scared of Jamie. She's a strong willed, controlling woman who doens't fuck around with emotions. So even though I don't talk to her anymore, I still have to wait a while before you hear the more entertaining stories.

A few corrections
I want to make sure my points are coming across correctly. As I've re-read what I've previously written, I might have seem a little harsh. Jamie is about the coolest person I've ever met. Anything that I've ever said that could have been construed as being mean, or degrading, or anything of the like, I regret more than anything else I've ever regretted in my life. This girl changed my life. She gave me a new outlook on so many things. The only thing hard in my life is not talking to her anymore. I feel as though I can deal with anything else. Any other situation, or problem that I have, or am going to have. I'm never going to stop thinking about her. I know that already due to how I've responded to 'the end' in the past. It's a different feeling now. So although I've given Jamie 4th place, there is no one I'd rather be with. I don't mean 4th place as I liked her the fourth most, or that everything was better 4 times with anyone else. Nothing like that. I put fourth place because that's how I would place the relationship. I know it seems wrong, but my grading was based off of how well I felt about the relationship, not the person. If I based it all on affection, it wouldn't even be close, I don't think I could put someone 2nd just because that wouldn't be correctly conveying the credit due to my affections for Jamie. She comes across my thoughts at least every day, and mostly at the worst time. Hope that clears things up for those that know Jamie or myself. I know the 4th place seemed wierd, like I was afraid to give her a better reason because of lingering emotions, or whatever. Obviously, that wouldn't apply.

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